Two days in a row, now, I have called Jaimie on my way home from work. A rough transcript of the beginning of each conversation:

“Hello, Jaimie Dawn.”

“Hi! *belch*“

“You burped!”

“Yes. *giggle* Are you coming home now?”

Two days in a row. I’m eagerly awaiting today’s conversation to see if it happens again.

No one tells you about many of the hilarious side effects when you start down this road we call pregnancy. Some of them are expected, sure, but others… not so much. Three bathroom breaks in a single 45-minute episode of Chuck? Well, okay, that makes sense: Baby is probably having fun sitting on, kicking, or otherwise interacting with Jaimie’s bladder.

Likewise, the random mood swings are a well-known phenomenon, and something I was therefore prepared for. Again, they make sense: there are even higher concentrations of hormones flooding Jaimie’s body than ever before, and in less predictable ways than she is used to. Accordingly, all of her emotions are ginormous. Good things are amazing. Bad things are horrible. Again: no surprise here.

Though the mechanisms behind them are slightly less obvious, odd food cravings too are to be expected. My mother apparently asked my father to get her a Wendy’s hamburger with McDonald’s french fries… an eminently sensible combination going by taste, but amusing nonetheless. Jaimie’s cravings have included jello, McDonald’s Chicken McNuggets (and terrible chicken nuggets in general), fruit snacks, and water with lemons in it. This last one has gotten so bad that she can’t drink water without lemon juice in it anymore.

Again, these are all expected. Brain malfunction, though? No one told me that was coming. Nor did anyone think to give me any warning about the impending assault of belches. But here they are, and apparently to stay. Though the last few days are the only times they’ve been part of a greeting, we’ve certainly experienced them with much more frequency in general throughout the whole pregnancy.

So, dear friends and family with experience: what other delightful (?) surprises can I expect as we enter the final trimester?